Forgive me...

I have no pictures to go along with this post. Honestly I don't think I want pictures to go along with this post. This account is only a snippet of our day...please don't think my entire day was a fiasco. Only this part. And I wanted to share it with you. Because sometimes, if you don't laugh...you'll cry. And I prefer laughter. Have I ever told you that I occasionally get this feeling that I'm in an episode of "Seinfeld" or some other twisted comedy? That I look over my shoulder for hidden cameras? Well, I do...not a lot...not everyday...but still, I do. And I'm not completely 100% convinced that there aren't hidden cameras...some stuff is just too bizarre to not catch on tape. 'Kay...here's what happened. In case you miss the "episode" when it airs...
We went to CVS today. "We" meaning Grace, Sam, and me. We went to get Earl some drugs to combat the upper respiratory infection that is slowly creeping its way to his chest. And whaddaya know?...CVS was having a sale! (I love CVS...did you know that? I love the little card and the sales and the random stuff they sell that no other store sells) Yup..."buy one CVS brand vitamin and get a second for ONE CENT"!! SHUT-UP! and sign me up! So we took a detour to the vitamin aisle. Both kids were shoved into the teeny, tiny CVS cart because they were wandering and fighting and making a general ruckus. It is best to contain my off-spring in small retail stores such as CVS. So...I found some vitamins for a super rocking deal (and some Hyland's teething tablets for Sam...the amazing never-ending teething child) and made my way to the pharmacy counter to pick up Earl's wonder drugs. It was there, while ringing me up, that the girl behind the counter told me that one of the vitamins I had chosen was NOT part of the "buy one, get one for ONE CENT!" deal, so I told her I'd be "right back" and turned the cart around to get vitamins that were part of the deal. It was in this instant that my life was transformed into a twisted, prime-time comedy. Because, you see, as I turned the cart...one of the wheels caught on some flooring, and the entire cart turned over. Yes, my bloggy followers, the teeny tiny CVS cart full of my children turned on. its. side. 70 lbs of kid...on the floor...in a matter of seconds. Whammo. But the best part? You wanna know the best part? I caught the cart...full of 70 lbs of kids...with. my. foot. Ouch. Grace, of course, erupted in wailing. Sam just looked at me, big blue eyes wondering what exactly was happening to him. And people swarmed over us...arms reaching out to help...pharmacy techs rushing forward with suckers to quiet the wailing. The children were righted...the cart was righted...and I was able to get the correct type of vitamins. We escaped without a scratch, save for a small, bruised bump on my left foot. I did not put the kids back in the teeny tiny cart. I paid for my items, and quickly headed out of the store. Grace kept pace with me...I think she was eager to leave too. But Sam...oh Sam...He got distracted by an M&M display and kinda lost his mind for a few moments. He came running out the door with hand fulls of M&M packages. We had a brief "discussion" about "shop-lifting" and "stealing" and "the police will take you to jail", returned the M&M's to their respective display, and then abruptly left CVS. I think we're gonna transfer our prescriptions elsewhere...I'm kinda afraid to show my face in that place again...

Okay...so we all know Earl travels...sometimes he travels A LOT. Whatever...it's part of the "job". The "job" that allows me to stay home and do my job...raising two miniature versions of Earl. (Someone once said we only had "one recipe" for kids...and that recipe is Earl. It's true, they look so much like him, it can freak a girl out) Crazy as they may drive me some days...God knows I love 'em. And they make me laugh and keep me on my toes and give me a great excuse to make cookies. Anyway...so there ya go. Earl travels...whatever...I'm sorta getting used to it, and while we miss him like crazy, I like the overtime and I like that I get to watch chick flicks without the witty input from my man. However, when he travels, I often find myself in situations I like to call "one parent + 2 children = great ability to improvise". Below is an example of such a situation. Earl was outta town and the night he left, a MONSTER storm came through right as I was putting the kids to bed...in fact I think I had put the kids to bed and was pouring a glass of wine. So...when I say MONSTER storm...I mean like windows rattling, flower pots flying, TV channel checking for tornado warnings, dog pacing the house and barking, kids fah-reaking out, MONSTER storm. Both kids were in their respective beds....CRYING out for "MAMA"!!!! I put down my glass of wine *sigh* and then began the back and forth, back and forth between their rooms. I did the usual repertoire of comforting prayers and songs and back rubbing. Telling each child that I had to "go check on your brother/sister" and that I would be "right back"...each time I left one room to go into the other room, the wailing would begin again. NOTHING. WAS. WORKING! So...here's what I did...

Yup...you guessed it. I just put 'em in the same bed. Threw 'em in together. Like the bible sez "Where two or more are gathered...", right? It was at that moment that the crying ceased and the laughing started. Amidst the thunder and lightening and wind, I heard quiet laughter and sweet sibling voices. I didn't have the heart to tell them to "be quiet and get to SLEEP"...instead I got my glass of wine, muted the TV, and listened to the "music"...which slowly got quieter and quieter. 30 minutes later I returned to check on my children...and found them sleeping peacefully...securely...together. If this isn't a good enough reason to have more than one child, I don't know what is. Siblings are a gift...sometimes they are an annoying gift...but in the storms of life, they can be a great comfort.

Grace dances

Yesterday was Grace's first dance recital. And no snide remarks about "Little Miss Perfect" or "Toddlers and Tiaras" or my being a "stage mom"...
I gotta confess though...it was a lot of fun. Sponge rollers...make-up...red lips and nails. The whole package. And Grace was totally fine with all of it...even insisting at one point that she "needed more mascara," and with eyes like hers I was happy to oblige.

Earl made it home just. in. time. to attend the performance. Good thing too...it was definitely an event he didn't want to miss. Being the father of a girl requires a certain degree of "ooooh-ing" and "ahh-ing" and "aren't you pretty!" that a mother can't really deliver.

Baby brother went too. He was the perfect little gentleman and clapped appropriately after each dance group finished.

I was kinda bummed that I didn't get flowers to give Grace after the performance. But Earl said that it was okay...that we'd go for ice cream instead...that ice cream trumps flowers any day.

So we went for ice cream...with sprinkles on top.

It was a fun night. A memorable night. Having a little girl is super fun...but lots of work. It took about 30 minutes to get the bobby pins out of her hair and a good 15 minutes to wipe off the waterproof mascara. It was worth it though...totally worth it.

The. End.

Here's the video

Grace is the 4th dancer from the right...the 3rd dancer from the left

Self-Expression

Alternatively titled: "The post in which Grace applies her own make-up, and then steals borrows my camera"

I don't think I need to say much of anything....the following pictures leave me speechless. I will say this one thing, I didn't know she had done this until last night when I downloaded pictures. It was a big surprise...I guess I need to upload pictures off my memory card more often than once every few months.

Okay...so...I'm sorry Justin...

But I had to steal this from your blog. (Check out my friend Justin's blog, here. He's a super cool guy, but...he doesn't drive a mini-van. Yet.)
Given the very serious tone of my blog posts lately, I thought only fair to lighten the mood a bit, and this is just the video to do it. I almost fell of the couch when I saw this the first time...I laughed so stinkin' hard.

Oh and yeh...I'm kinda a big deal...


Bwahahahahahahahahaha!

Delia-May Jeanie Farris ran into the arms of Jesus yesterday, May 1st. She was born into the arms of Christ on the very same day, 31 years ago, I was born into this world. She was 63 years old...about a month shy of her 64th birthday. She was married to the same man for 42 years..they loved each other with a love so deep I find it hard to comprehend. She raised two amazing men. It's hard to raise a good man. Jeanie raised two. She loved animals. She smelled like Oscar perfume. She loved being an American. She adored her grandchildren, and showered them with kisses and hugs and way too many toys. She collected magnets. She liked those singing stuffed animals (you know the ones...you push a button on their "paw" and they sing some loud and crazy song?). She was a great cook. She always had an endless supply of bean dip and fritos. She was a believer in Jesus Christ, and had an unwavering faith that God. was. good.

Some may say she lost her fight with cancer, but I say really...if you think on it...she won. Can you imagine the party? The celebration? It must have been wonderful! I know she is dancing with the baby we lost 7 years ago...walking Jessie, a dog she loved like a child...sitting, rapt, at the feet of her Lord. We miss her. And the house is empty here, quiet. But we have a hope...a most amazing hope...and we know that we will see her again. I love you, crazy-haired Grandma...thanks for everything.
**This was written a few days after I arrived in TX...after Jeanie died...it's been hard for me to get on a computer to publish anything...