I've been thinking about my mother-in-law a lot.  I miss her.  It goes deeper than I thought it would.  She and I had a special relationship.  We shared the same man.  She knew him deeply, as do I...
I don't know what has brought this on.  The past 3 or 4 days she has been on the edge of my conscience.  There, but not.  Almost touchable.  I wish I had another morning to share a cup of coffee with her.  Another late night to eat chocolate silk pie and drink box wine with her.  I wish I could hear her laugh.  See her dance with my children.
She was there.  And then...gone.  In the blink of an eye.
If you read my posts on Facebook, you may have read a recent one that mentioned my wanting "do-overs".  I do not wish to live life differently.  Every mistake, wrong/right decision I have made in my 31 years was mine to make, and I do not regret my life.  God has woven a beautiful, colorful tapestry of my life...I am proud of it.  I only wish I had more time...

He's gonna hate me for this...

2 years ago Grace wanted to be "Ariel" for Halloween.  This was also the year that she thought the sky would be orange on Halloween night.  Remember??  You can go here to read that post again...
So for one night (and a couple of hours a preschool) my diva was transformed into a most beautiful mermaid.  I kept the costume.  We have a dress up box that is full to the brim.  I think every Disney princess dress ever made is shoved in there.  Cinderella, Mulan, Snow White, and of course Ariel.  The costume is getting small.  The "tail" is no longer floor length.  It's more like a "capri-length" tail.  But it's still fun to squeeze into and "swim" around the living room. 

(Okay...blogger has a new posting editor...this may or may not turn out so pretty.  I have no idea how to work this thing.  WHY do they have change things??  I don't want a new look...I want the old look!!!)
ANYway...
We have above said mermaid costume...Dress up is a favorite pastime in our house.
Baby brother likes to dress up too.
He has boy costumes.  A pirate.  Cowboy hats, a holster, guns.  A train conductor hat.  But he really, really likes his sister.  I would venture to say that he is obsessed with her.  He is sad when she goes to school.  Some days he cries.  And he asks about her at least one time an hour...all. day. long.  It's a party everyday she arrives home.  He thinks she is fan.tas.tic.  And anything she dresses up in?  Well, he must dress up in too...forget the boy stuff...bring on the sequins.

We tossed the wig...it got nasty...looked like Ariel after a few dicey nights on the streets.  So he improvised.  With a wizard hat.  And the beads around his neck later become some sort of weapon.  So he lost those. That's one thing Grace never did...make weapons out of anything and everything.

Yup...it's a match made in heaven.  I have a big sister I'm obsessed with too.  I'd dress up like a mermaid if she told me to.  And I'm in my 30's.  Guess it's a pretty important relationship.  Good thing he has such wonderful big sister material to work with...

Sam is has started talking...it's something I have worried about. His speech...or really, his lack of speech. He's been reserved for the better part of his short 2 1/2 years with us. Who can blame the boy? His sister never shuts up. She talks for him. She talks to him. She talks...all. the. time. But now that she is in school for the better part of the day, in the silence Sam has found his voice. He's always been funny. Silly. A goofball. And now that he has narrative to work with? Well...he's reached a whole new level of funny.
I wanted to write this down so that I won't forget it...it has made me chuckle most of the day....
Today we went to Kohl's to get a Christmas gift for Grace. (She wants those Twinkle Toes light up shoes...who am I to say "no"? Lights? Rhinestones? Where do I sign?) When we walked into the store Sam started saying "Uh-oh mommy...Uh-0h...Mommy! Uh-oh!!! UH-OH!! MOM!!!" He was quite frantic, and at first I thought maybe he had dropped something, but he quickly clarified the problem for me. "MOMMY!! Heads! Uh-oh! Heads...gone! Uh-oh!" And then I saw what I have failed to see on previous shopping trips. The mannequins at Kohl's?...they're headless. I have to say, it is quite disturbing. And I can't believe I've never noticed it before. Not one mannequin had a head...not. a. single. one. In the entire store. I know this because Sam pointed out each and every plastic display..."mommy...uh-oh...heads" He got rather quiet as we rolled through the store...mumbled to himself. I don't think he ever quite understood why they were headless...but come to think of it...I don't think I quite understand either.

Talking Sam. Funny Sam. Oh Sam....

I thought I would try to play "catch up" on here...I had fantastic plans to post pictures of our summer outings and blog about all the fun we had. This is afterall, the "journal" of our family. But, honestly, the very idea of it wears. me. out. So here's what we're gonna do...I'm gonna just start here. And try to keep up. Wish me luck.

We went to the circus last Saturday. It was Earl's idea. He bought the tickets, he planned where we would eat dinner, he even drove the car (because frankly the parking garage freaks me out...big time). I love it when I don't have to be the "ringleader" (hardee-har-har!) of a family outing. Now the last time I remember going to the circus was as a child. And the only thing I recall from my one and only trip to the Big Top was that I was scared...I spent the entire show with my head buried in the crook of my Papa's arm. As a result of this experience, I am not a fan of clowns...so I haven't been all too eager to expose my sweet baby children to something that was so terrifying for me as a child. But Earl? Earl is the fun parent. We've discussed this before. And, as it turns out, a great "event" planner as well. Who knew!? We ate at the downtown grocery store for dinner. Doesn't sound too exciting does it? Well, let me tell ya...it was GREAT! The selection was ginormous! Everyone got to pick out exactly what they wanted to eat...I got sushi. Some very yummy sushi, I might add. The kids got a turkey sandwich (always a hit when you're 5). Earl got a turkey sandwich too...I guess it's a hit when you're 36 as well. Then we headed to the arena early to see the pre-show (read: clowns doing clown things).

Here ya go...a picture of a clown...doing clowny sorts of things...notice, he's standing on a skateboard while juggling. Pretty impressive. And not a bit scary. Sam absolutely loved this guy...He was so enthralled with the clown's juggling/skateboarding skills he couldn't close his mouth...shoulda taken a picture of that...hind-sight...20/20...


The circus was fun. It was over the top...it was big...it was loud...it was overstimulating. We had a blast. Earl insisted upon buy each kid a bag of cotton candy for $12 a piece. Yeh, you read that right...$12 a bag! Sure there was a cheap wizard hat that came with it...but $12?! Really? Whatever. We made a memory, right? And our kids like cotton candy now...unlike when we went to Disney on Ice, and they cried when we tried to them feed fluffy sugar. You can read about that here. (Oh and by the way...I think Earl must have some sort of positive childhood memory attached to cotton candy. He thinks it's the end-all-be-all...the stuff makes his eyes light up)

Sam's signature smile. He kinda looks like Jack Nicholson, doesn't he?


We had a fun. And I was cool with the clowns. They're generally harmless. But I still don't wanna get too close...

Kindergarten girl

Yesterday was Grace's first day of Kindergarten. I know, I can't believe it either. We both did great. No, really...we did. She walked right in...ready for the day. I am continually amazed at this kid. I got a bit weepy as I turned to leave...got a bit weepy as I walked back through the halls and out the door. But I found a friend (Tracy, if you're reading this, you'll never know how much it meant to simply walk with you yesterday morning) and then Sam and I went for a run. And so it begins...

Summer...

has kept us very...very...very busy. Good busy. Fun busy. But crazy busy all the same. I just realized I haven't blogged since the first part of July. We didn't fall off the face of the earth...
Here's the "Cliff Note" summary of July/early part of August (sorry no pics, this is a quickie):
--Earl went to London for 2 weeks.
--We went on a mini vacation to Omaha. Rocking zoo. Absolutely amazing. No words (or even pictures, although I do plan to post pics of our trip) do it justice.
--Earl went to San Antonio for a week for training.
--The kids and I attended Vacation Bible School. GREAT fun! Over 350 kids attended. As I type, Sam is rocking out in his sister's room to the soundtrack from the VBS. Love it.
--Grace and I went to Girl Scout Daycamp. "Sisterhood of the Traveling Sash"...I've been waiting for this day! When we found out Grace was a girl, I began dreaming of teaching all about scouting. Don't know if y'all know it or not, but I'm a HARDcore Girl Scout. Have my Girl Scout Gold (equivalent to the Boy Scout Eagle) and am a Lifetime member of Girl Scouting. In 1996, I went to Europe for 6 weeks with the Girl Scouts. I have sold more boxes of cookies than I care to count.
--Our dear friends, Connor and Glenda came to visit. Grace and Connor have known each other all their lives. Their bond is strong (as is MY bond with Glenda). They say they are going to get married when they grow up. It was a wonderful visit. Thanks for making the drive Glenda!
--We just returned from a 4 day visit to my sister's house in Arkansas. We haven't seen each other since CHRISTMAS. THAT is criminal! I was itching to visit her, so we hopped in the car and drove 8+ hours south. Had a great visit. Totally worth the drive.
--Sam is learning to use the potty. (Thanks to cousin Isaac for peaking Sam's interest in the ways of "big boys"!)
--Grace is starting Kindergarten on the 16th.
--Danny leaves for a week of training next week.
--I am working on my resume. Thinking of finding a part-time job. Nothing big. Or even exciting. Just need to stimulate my brain. Keep my chops up.

So there it is: Crazy (with a capital "C")...I'll get some pics up soon...

Patience pays off

We have a fantastic backyard. We have a fantastic home really...when you add it all up. It's not big. It's not fancy. I don't have granite counter tops or new carpet, stainless steel appliances or big rooms. But we do have the things that count...to me anyway. We have great neighbors. We live on a kid-friendly cul-de-sac. At any given time there could be 10 children pedaling around on their bicycles or playing a game of hide-and-go-seek. Our backyard backs up to the elementary school. The sun rises and sets just right...we have shade in the front yard in the morning and shade in the backyard in the evening. Our backyard is large, but not large enough to make mowing a chore. It's perfect for for barking dogs and children with plentiful amounts of energy. Over the past 2 1/2 years that we have lived here, Earl and I have discussed purchasing a wooden play set. The backyard begs for it. There is the perfect level spot just asking for swings and climbing walls and slides. But sheesh!!!...have you priced those things? Well I have...and wowsa! They are expensive and heavy and difficult to put together. And before you say anything, YES...we've searched Craigslist for a used play set. But apparently, we're not the only family on the hunt and each time we found one in our price range, in our area...whammo, it's already sold. So we gave up. Yes...you read that right...we. gave. up. We bought the kids bicycles and a bottle of bubbles and told 'em to be happy with what they had. And I also took 'em to the park...a lot.
Enter...patience...
Now let's get this right. Patience is not a virtue I possess. So for instance, if someone were to describe me to you they might say "oh yeh, I know her...she's funny and crazy and a neat freak"...but they would not say "oh...and she's so patient". Nonononono folks...I am not patient. I am the exact opposite of patient. I am antsy, and worried, and busy. Very busy. So when I say "patience pays off" I want you to know that it is God who intervenes in my life, and pours His patience right over my little bitty impatient head. And I also want you to know that He is interested in every little minute detail of your life...including your search for a wooden play set for your children and your vegetable gardens and even your animals. He wants to be in relationship with us. He likes us. He thinks we are absolutely without a doubt fantastic, fabulous creatures. Even if we are insufferably impatient.
So...I suppose I should say...Enter God...and His overflowing patience.
Hang on, this will all make sense shortly. Last year, I went to a neighbor's garage sale. A neighbor that just happened to have a...wooden swing set! I asked this neighbor if they wanted to sell the play set to me. I worked all the angles. "I have two children who would LOVE to have such a structure! We live so close, it would be a cinch to move it!"...but nope. No deal. They weren't ready to sell. So I tried one last move. I gave 'em my card. Said if/when they were ready to sell it to please give me a call. Fast forward one year later. No call. No word. Nothing. The swing set remained--unused--in their yard. Bummer. But wait...you'll remember that we sorta gave up...moved on...decided that we didn't really need a wooden swing set. We were content with our situation. There is much to be said about being content. But (oh yes...there's a "but"!) then Earl called me on his way to work early one Friday morning about a month ago. "GET DRESSED! Go up the street! They're having another garage sale!" I didn't even have to ask who "they" were or why it was such an exciting thing that "they" were having a garage sale. I knew. I knew what he was talking about! The swing set! I threw on some clothes, loaded the kids in the car, and made my way toward our neighbor's house. And there it was...with a price tag hanging from the A-frame. $100!!! WHAT??!?!?!?! Are you crazy? SOLD!! Patience pays off. I'm glad that God is in the little things. Like swing sets.
With the help of a dear friend (Thank you Justin...we can't thank you enough!), Earl moved the massive wooden structure across the neighborhood and into our backyard. The backyard that was just waiting for children to come and swing and climb and enjoy.

Since getting the swing set, Grace has learned to swing all by her little bitty self. She is so proud! It sorta makes me wanna throw up watching her, she gets going so high!

And Brother...oh...baby brother. He is a dare-devil. Not an ounce of fear. He loves going down the slide. Head first.


But, unlike his big sister, he doesn't know how to swing by himself yet. So he has learned to say (in the world's sweetest voice) "Swing? Daddy? Swing? More?"

It didn't take him long to navigate the climbing wall...I'm not surprised. He's been climbing since before he could walk. Like really climbing...on the kitchen table and the counters. Before. he. could. walk.

The neighborhood kids are like moths to a flame. When we go outside to play, they come running to the gate. "Can we play?" "Yes" I answer "Does your mother know where you are?" This is Gage in the picture below. He is such a nice little boy. And is so kind to Sam.

Another neighborhood kid. Brooke. She's a mess. Talks non-stop. Grace loves her. You might remember her from this post.

And lastly...the boyz. They spend a good deal of time out in the backyard. Not a lot. Harry hates the heat. But more time than we have spent out there. And I think they are glad that we have finally come out to join them.

Oh, and just cause I was uploading pics and I had you held captive your attention. Here's my garden! Looking at this picture, I can't believe how much it has grown in just a few weeks! I need to take a newer picture. The green beans along the back fence are now up to the top of the fence and the tomato plants are out of control! The black "box" to the right of the picture is my compost bin! Holy moly! It's so much fun! No really...it is. I like to see how much of my food trash I can dump into it instead of putting in the "real" trash. Egg shells, coffee and coffee filters, banana peels...it's like a really twisted science project.

And now...let's have a moment of silence. See this sweet little tree? It's a Pin Oak. I planted it near the swing set in memory of my mother in law. I had dreams of it growing and shading my children as they played. Well...it died. Good thing Lowe's has a return policy. Anybody got advice on tree planting? Anybody? Well, I am open to advice...

So there ya go. A post about swing sets and dogs and gardens and neighbor kids and patience. My big sister says not to pray for patience because then God will put you in a situation that forces you to be patient. I dunno about that. But I do tend to do whatever my big sister tells me to do. And so I don't specifically pray for patience. I often pray "God...you made these kids...now tell me what to do with them"...Never "God...give me patience to not hide in the closet today" However, since this small demonstration of how God poured down HIS patience on me, without me asking for it or really even realizing it was happening until after the fact...I am more apt to look for opportunities to be patient. Waiting really isn't that bad...and it pays off. Most of the time it doesn't turn out the way we thought it would turn out...it turns out better. It turns out God's way...in God's timing. God is good...all the time. All the time...God is good. Be content.