I'm testing out a new parenting technique....compliments of my big sister--the teacher...she's reading this book...she won't shut-up about it...sounds like smart advice to me...so I thought I'd try it out on my diva....here's the technique...
Instead of telling a child to do something ("Go brush your teeth") or asking them using the words "can" or "could" ("Could you take your plate to the sink for me?"), this book suggests saying "will" or "would" ("Will you go clean up your room?")--I'm not so sure of all the details (remember my sister is the one reading this book, then telling me what she thinks might work for me) but something about empowerment of the child, belief that this child is capable of the task before them, blah blah blah...sounds simple right?? Piece of cake, huh???...hahahahahahaha...the author of this book has OBVIOUSLY never met my Grace. My sis said it has (and I quote) "worked like a charm" with her children (my niece and nephew, ages 6 and 8--who I am beginning to think just might be little angels in disguise...with their mop of white blond hair and all)

Here is what happened when I tried the above "technique" on Grace:
Me: "Grace, would you get your toys cleaned up before we go outside to play?"
Grace: "Ummmm...no thanks...I'll do it later"

"NO THANKS"???? "NO"...."THANKS"....????? Well at least in her defiance she is polite...

I have a friend with twins...3 1/2 year old twins...their momma, Anna, has a certain level of patience that blows my mind. These children are some of the funniest people I know (I say "people" because they rank up there with some of the funniest adults I know...) They are seriously a trip. If you are having a bad day, call E&I and your day will suddenly get MUCH to busy to focus on your own troubles. This summer Anna and I are doing a "test" run of co-op babysitting. She watches my monsters for two hours on any given day of the week, and I in turn watch the twins for a couple of hours on another day of the week. This week was the first week...hallelujah! With Danny being out of town, two hours of alone time seems like an eternity! I enjoyed my day...I went shopping, got a coffee (and drank it while it was still hot), listened to "big girl" music in the car...it was enough time to renew my spirit and run some errands without having two little ones in tow. Then came Thursday...my day to watch E&I...they came over early in their p.j.'s. W e had waffles, the girls fought over jewelry and dress up clothes, the boys ate another helping of waffles...and then I realized just how small my house was becoming, so I dressed E&I, put some shoes on the baby, and marched them all outside. It was fairly early--8:30 or so--but our across the street neighbors were up too. Their air conditioner had gone out the week before and the air conditioner company was already there, working away, installing a new unit. A HUGE AC unit...big...large...and if you think like me, you reason that somewhere? there is the box that housed this huge cooling machine. A box PERFECT to entertain 3 preschoolers for a significant amount of time. So, after chatting with the heating and cooling guys, I became the proud owner of a ginormous box which quickly became a playhouse. After cutting a door and a few window in varying shapes and sizes, I handed the kids a box of markers (careful to instruct that "we ONLY color on the box, not on each other") and a masterpiece was made.

Coloring ON the box and NOT on her body...what a good girl!
And then they figured out how to climp ON TOP of the box...good thing it was sturdy...
Hmmmm...didn't I say "don't write on each other"? I guess I didn't say "Don't write on the BABY"...Always remember, when dealing with preschoolers...be VERY specific....

*Thanks air conditioning guys...for the fleeting moments of sanity your box provided...you truly are "Higglytown heros"

Where to begin?

I've been slacking in the blog dept lately...Spring seems to make life "roll" faster, and I can't seem to find time to update the blog (and I know you've been waiting with baited breath--hee hee)...Life is a circus here. Grace and Sam seem to change every second of the day. Grace says things waaay beyond her years and Sam says things, well, in order to get food...he's pretty quiet unless there is sustanance involved. Here are some of his words at one year of age:

Harry (our dog and Sam's first word...I think he learned this because Harry is his constant companion. Esp at the highchair. Harry sits patiently waiting for food to fall--and it usually does--while I scream "Harry...LEAVE IT!! HARRY OUT!!")
Dada (he says this in a sweet and endearing way...like Daddy is his own personal superhero)
Sissy (again, very sweetly...he thinks Grace is LOTS of fun)
MAMAMAMAMAMAMAMA (he normally squeals this at me in a loud and demanding sort of tone...it is usually related to food, or lack of food...I am NOT a superhero, I am a food source...often this is accompanied by his pulling at my shirt searching for his much loved "ninny")
Bite? (this is always a question...Like "Where in the heck is a bite of food WOMAN?")
Mmmmmmmm (as in "mmmmmm, this is the BEST food I've ever eaten")
More (sounds like "mo...Mo...MO!!!!" and goes hand in hand with beating on the highchair tray for more FOOD...right now...if I don't get it, I will surely waste away!!!)
Bye-bye (normally used when he is ready to LEAVE his current situation in search of food--i.e. the grocery store cart or car seat--and he wants to leave now!!! Sounds something like "byebyebyebye, mama, byebyebye...MAMA!!! BYE BYE!!!)

That's about the extent of it...did I mention the child likes to eat?? :) Today for breakfast he had 1/2 a banana, 1 egg, and THREE pancakes...

I know I haven't posted much lately. Lots of things going on in the Farris household...I'll update when I can. I just wanted to post this today--Easter...it was a reminder that sometimes it is best for us to see the story of Easter with fresh, childlike eyes. Nothing reminds us of this like telling the Easter story to a 4 year old. Grace was up BRIGHT and early this morning, she opened her Easter basket, and then I sat down with her to go through the "Resurrection Eggs" (see here if you don't know what these are) It's a difficult thing for ME to understand--why God would come down, live a human life, walk among us, and then DIE a horrible death for MY sins--so you can understand how hard it is to explain to someone under 4 feet tall who thinks Jesus is some sort of spiritual superhero and who's only concept of death comes from seeing a dead cat on the road during a walk. We went through the eggs--one by one--the donkey...the chalice...the crown of thorns ("Ouch, don't you think that would hurt to have on YOUR head? What if your princess crowns had thorns on them?")...the cross...the dice ("They STOLE his clothes...that's not very nice is it?")...the spear ("Was there blood mama?")...and finally death ("Jesus was dead...like that dead cat we saw on the road") She never lost interest. In fact, as I type she is making Danny re-tell the story. I didn't think she was listening really, I didn't expect her to fully understand...I just want her to NEVER remember a time in her life when she didn't know that Christ took the ultimate "time out" for her...that He lives with us, walks beside us...Hallelujah!! But she WAS listening and trying her very best to relate this story to her simple little life....the next egg was the linen cloth Joseph ("Jesus' friend") wrapped His body in after He died. Grace looked at me, wrinkled her liddle forehead and said "Like a big band-aid Mama?"....yes Grace...like a big band-aid...

When Jesus saw what was happening, he was angry with his disciples. He said to them, "Let the children come to me. Don't stop them! For the Kingdom of God belongs to those who are like these children. I tell you the truth, anyone who doesn't receive the Kingdom of God like a child will never enter it." Then he took the children in his arms and placed his hands on their heads and blessed them. --Mark 10:14-16

Danny found Grace a princess bicycle last summer at a garage sale...the lady having the garage sale, upon seeing Grace's excitement over her new "wheels", knocked the price down from $5 to $2. A steal! Just needed a bit of cleaning up, some WD40, new training wheels, and a little TLC, and Grace would be the envy of the neighborhood. It took close to an hour to get it in working order (good thing Daddy knows about bicycles), then Grace donned her Princess helmet (a girl's gotta match of course) and proceeded to take her first spin around the driveway. It was a short spin. Lasting all of about 5 seconds...long enough for her to throw her leg over the bike, sit her little bootie on the seat and then promptly fall off. Luckily...I had my camera ready when the "accident" happened and I was able to document the drama.

No amount of convincing could get her BACK on the bike--as you can see from the picture below--Daddy tried to show her how FUN riding bicycles can be and that "look even Daddy can ride it"...but she insisted upon going inside for a popsicle. Leaving a grown man, riding a VERY small bicycle....This was last summer...2008...the remainder of the warm days were spent riding her quite study little red tricycle.

Flash forward to 2009...about a month past her fourth birthday and MUCH more mature and grown-up . We had a run of unseasonably warm weather and spent most of our days (except for naptime) outside. On one of these sunny mornings, Grace asked me to "please put on my helmet"--then she wheeled her princess bike out of the garage, threw her leg over the seat, and pedeled off saying something like "I'm bigger now...see my legs are long...I can ride my bicycle"

SHE put this outfit together...There is NO way I could even stomach that much pink...

It's amazing to see them grow...empowering and bittersweet all in the same moment. She is quite a character and each day with her is an adventure. I love you liddle bike riding diva...xoxo, Momma

God is funny...

I often get "caught up" in life and fail to see the humor that God presents to me...just to make me smile...I am quite convinced He loves to see me smile. Of course, I am continually reminded that God has a wonderful sense of humor...He reveals this to me EVERY stinkin' day through my children. They are beautifully crafted, perfectly made...He really did a nice job with them...they are joyful and curious creatures, sometimes they are naughty--very naughty and SOMEtimes even this is funny (see previous blog re. Grace turning Sam into a "spaceman")...but the BEST part about both of my children is the humorous way they go through life...I would be silly not to credit it back to God, I am certain He had quite an adventure creating them. But sometimes God chooses to tickle my funny bone in what I consider to be serious adult matters and He makes it glaringly obvious that His hand is at work in the unnecessary worry of life. Earl and I have recently started the Dave Ramsey course called "Financial Peace University"...it is a very intense course that teaches people how to manage their money and "dump" debt. Now, even the WORD "budget" makes me twitch--you know the tiny muscle at the corner of your eye?? Yeah, it makes THAT muscle twitch...makes me worried and uneasy and FREAKED out...But Dave says that couples MUST have a "budget committee meeting"...they MUST communicate, must be "on the same page" about money. Sooooo we did it. We just sat down and tackled the most intense budget we have EVER taken on in our 7 years of marriage. The first thing, the VERY first thing we did was to pray...we asked God to move in our lives, to guide our decisions and help us to manage our money so that we might further His kingdom. It took us a little over 2 hours (the budget, not the prayer)...I think we broke the calculator. We crunched numbers, we double checked, triple checked EVERYTHING. It was SERIOUS eye-twitching business... As we started to finish up and finalize our numbers, we came up with an extra $20 on one form...what???!! (there are TWO forms...one that is more general and another that is VEEEEERY detailed) Where did THAT come from...why do our forms not MATCH?? $20 is a LOT of money...you can do a lot with $20...WHERE DID IT COME FROM??? WHERE?? $20 times 12 months is...wait, give me a second...$240!!! So we scrutinized the pages (yes, I said "pages") of our newly formed budget...we poured over them...we added up the numbers again and again and STILL...$20...but from WHERE??? Then we found it...It was the VERY first thing we had written down, over 2 hours before--our promise to give to the Lord, right there...under the "giving" section. We had written a total that was $20 MORE than we had promised to the church earlier in the year....somehow it got lost in translation from one form to another. God is funny...He was right there...in the middle of this most "serious" meeting. And He was REMINDING us WHO exactly was in control as well as appealing to my need for a bit of humor in the midst of it all. Just to reassure you--we are currently "even" now...the budget is right on and everything adds up....and we're STILL married (happily I might add)...whew.
I AM...funny, loving, involved in all the little eye-twitching details of your life...I AM...

Then and now

Earl came home from work today and told me that one of the "new guys" at the office has a 12 week old baby. He told this to me casually, while I cleaned up the dinner dishes...the conversation went something like this: Earl--"The new guy is from blah, blah, blah" Me--"Oh that's nice. Is he married?" Earl--"uh, uhhhhh...oh, yeah! They have a 12 week old baby" And SUDDENLY, as I stood at the sink scrubbing turkey meatballs off the highchair tray, I was whisked back to one year ago...to LAST February...2008...Earl was in training on the east coast, Grace and I were forging our way in a strange town and a new house, Sam was curled in my tummy...it seems like a lifetime ago. As I stood there at the sink, I said quietly to no one in particular "That means she (the 'new guys' wife) was pregnant while he was in training"...Earl nodded in confirmation, then was pulled away to play "Daddy dragon" with Grace. But I stood there a moment longer...quietly contemplating how different my life is than it was just a year ago....I'm sure I'll meet the "new guys" wife at the next work get together, might even learn her name...I hope I don't scare her with my lingering hug. I only want her to know that I've been there too...
Then I heard Sam-O sitting at my feet, throwing tupperware into every corner of the kitchen and I was snapped back to the present....wow, how far we've come and how far we have to go.